Blah.
Ehhh.
That is how I feel right now.
Just a little depressed. Not really even depressed just...meh.
I feel like I am not giving 100% to anything in my life right now.
I feel like I could be a better wife and homemaker but when I get home from work I am spent and tired.
I feel like I could be a better worker at work but when I am here 6 days a week I am constantly burnt out.
I feel like I could be a better Christian if I really put a lot more time and thought into my prayer life and Bible study.
I feel like I could be a better sister/daughter if I called my relatives more.
I could be a better friend if I put more effort into going to see people/call people.
I even feel like I am letting Grandma down because I havent called her in forever!
WHO AM I??
I know the grass is always greener on the otherside.
I get it.
But right now I want to just try the other side. Its like a pillow.
Its hot and flat but when you flip it over its instantly coler and more cushey!
I really feel like I should be a stay at home wife now.
I know it sounds cray. I could work. But I know my boss would probably not hear of me changing my schedule and I am SO. Burnt. OUT. With. WORK.
Thankful to have a job! So thankful. But Hubby has his own business now and life is extreemly chaotic. I barely see him and when I do we are organizing the house and still trying to get it straight or going to see other people.
I just want to stay at home and enjoy my house and organize things and garden. LOL. I know it sounds crazy but I feel like I could at least focus on something 100% then!!!!!
Who knows what the future holds but I hope I get that opportunity one day.
I also feel like such a slacker BLOGGER. Not to mention DIETER.
After the wedding (I will try to do a post on that soon) I just totally fell off the wagon and hit every rock on the way down. I have been eating HORRIBLY. And exercize? Zilch. Even cancled my gym membership. Because I have an elliptical now, bought from my mother. Have I used it? NOPE!
FAIL. LIFE. FAIL.
Besides the fact I am even scared to weigh right now...
One day last week I ate two taco salads. With the shell. Two. One for lunch, one for dinner.
I am also hosting a book club once a week at a starbucks and then Bible Study once a month. Which each of them get about 50-75% of my effort.
Anyone else feel like this latley?? I hope I'm not alone!
Well I am going to try to turn this around today. I am have already tracked MFP and I am going to get subway for lunch. Lets make it a great day!
Lauryn I am there right now more than I can put into words. I am literally so burned out. But you're doing the best you can. We both are. That is insane you work 6 days a week. That is too much
ReplyDeleteDefinitely not alone, girl!
ReplyDeleteYour wreath is SUPER cute. I felt exactly like you are talking about right after I got married, I think it's totally normal to want to do all those homemaker-ey/wifey things. You will get back on track!
ReplyDeleteYou sure do sound like me a few months back!!! Have you heard of Zeal for Life? I would totally send you some samples....it is my "blah" blocker :) I actually wrote a post about it...check it out and email me if it interests you!!!
ReplyDeletehttp://guntersabroad.blogspot.co.uk/2014/02/zealforlife.html
OMG this post describes how I have been feeling too.. You are so not alone!
ReplyDelete