Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Not 100% Anywhere


That is how I feel right now. 

Just a little depressed.  Not really even depressed just...meh. 

I feel like I am not giving 100% to anything in my life right now. 

I feel like I could be a better wife and homemaker but when I get home from work I am spent and tired. 

I feel like I could be a better worker at work but when I am here 6 days a week I am constantly burnt out. 

I feel like I could be a better Christian if I really put a lot more time and thought into my prayer life and Bible study. 

I feel like I could be a better sister/daughter if I called my relatives more. 

I could be a better friend if I put more effort into going to see people/call people. 

I even feel like I am letting Grandma down because I havent called her in forever!


I know the grass is always greener on the otherside. 

I get it. 

But right now I want to just try the other side.  Its like a pillow. 

Its hot and flat but when you flip it over its instantly coler and more cushey!

I really feel like I should be a stay at home wife now. 

I know it sounds cray.  I could work.  But I know my boss would probably not hear of me changing my schedule and I am SO. Burnt. OUT.  With. WORK. 

Thankful to have a job! So thankful.  But Hubby has his own business now and life is extreemly chaotic.  I barely see him and when I do we are organizing the house and still trying to get it straight or going to see other people. 

I just want to stay at home and enjoy my house and organize things and garden.  LOL.  I know it sounds crazy but I feel like I could at least focus on something 100% then!!!!! 

Who knows what the future holds but I hope I get that opportunity one day. 

I also feel like such a slacker BLOGGER.  Not to mention DIETER. 

After the wedding (I will try to do a post on that soon) I just totally fell off the wagon and hit every rock on the way down.  I have been eating HORRIBLY.  And exercize?  Zilch.  Even cancled my gym membership.  Because I have an elliptical now, bought from my mother.  Have I used it?  NOPE! 


Besides the fact I am even scared to weigh right now...

One day last week I ate two taco salads.  With the shell.  Two.  One for lunch, one for dinner. 

I am also hosting a book club once a week at a starbucks and then Bible Study once a month. Which each of them get about 50-75% of my effort. 

Anyone else feel like this latley?? I hope I'm not alone! 

Well I am going to try to turn this around today.  I am have already tracked MFP and I am going to get subway for lunch.  Lets make it a great day!

My cute wreath I made for around 12 bucks for Independence Day!


  1. Lauryn I am there right now more than I can put into words. I am literally so burned out. But you're doing the best you can. We both are. That is insane you work 6 days a week. That is too much

  2. Your wreath is SUPER cute. I felt exactly like you are talking about right after I got married, I think it's totally normal to want to do all those homemaker-ey/wifey things. You will get back on track!

  3. You sure do sound like me a few months back!!! Have you heard of Zeal for Life? I would totally send you some samples....it is my "blah" blocker :) I actually wrote a post about it...check it out and email me if it interests you!!!


  4. OMG this post describes how I have been feeling too.. You are so not alone!


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